Country Living
Honestly, I really should have. We were moving to the Caribbean. I wasn’t going to be working for the first time ever. It was going to be sunny all of the time. So, do you know what I thought I’d be doing?
Having babies? Ummm, no. :)
Deep sea fishing? No thanks.
You’re going to laugh. I laugh now. I seriously, honest to goodness, thought I was going to have the mac-daddiest garden known to man. I know. Total laugh worthy. I’ll give you a minute.
Fern Creek Design
Now, just to explain, we always were gardeners. Well, when I say “we”, I mean “he”. That not stencil loving, not wallet organizer using husband of mine.
We’ve provided many a neighborhood with our abundance of tomatoes, and cucumbers, and basil, and onions. We even went the extra effort learn about the proper hilling for potatoes, and to plant garlic early in the season…even earlier than you’d think. And that you better start eating that cilantro before it goes to seed, because it goes quick. Too quick to plant tomatoes and onions and cilantro in the same garden and think you’re going to make salsa with that same produce. And we had beautiful herbs, and flowers and hedging. All that jazz.
See, we gardened. Or, he gardened. And I ate.
And, just to cut to the chase. Apparently I don’t garden. :)
Martha Stewart
I tried. There was a seriously valiant effort. Seeds were bought. Seedlings were grown in egg cartons. Germination was quicker than he’d ever seen. Cute little seedlings were planted in a poorly prepped area in the yard.
There were celebratory cocktails in recognition of my “garden”. I was proud. I was providing for my family in my own way, I was not wasting away my time on this little island. I was gardening. :)
But, did you know that iguanas and lizards are herbivorous? Do you know how long it took them to take down my little seedlings like I had planted them specifically for their dinner? No? Me either, because they were ALL GONE by the time I got up the next morning.
Tilly’s Cottage
I tried caging the next set. And now have visions of teams of lizards working together, standing on their back legs while using their “arms” to lift up our cages and let their buddies proceed to eliminate my second, third and there may have even been a fourth attempt at a garden. It was sad really.
But not being easily deterred I did manage one, very small, short-lived moment of almost success with a pot. If it’s just one plant and one pot can you really call it a pot garden? I don’t even know why I thought it was a good idea. We know lizards can climb.
But I was determined to be a gardener, so I planted my remaining tomato seeds in a pot. And they grew.
Hey, I know it’s not pretty, but it was as good as it got. Look at all of the luscious fruit. What, you can’t see it? Oh, here, let me give you a closer look.
And just so we’re clear here. That, my friends, is one little cherry tomato. It looks almost ready doesn’t it. Probably tomorrow, that was my thought. And really, I have no idea why I took the pictures. Either to prove that I was a gardener, or that I wasn’t … I’m not sure exactly.
But, I do know exactly what I was thinking the next morning when that little sucker was gone.
I should have known. :/
And, to save my sanity, I have moved on to creating canvas dog silhouettes, pallet storage crates and dumpster dive door message centers.
And … I am going to prove to everyone that they are not the worst gardener at Nester’s party.
The Nester
At least you got photographic evidence before the iguanas made off with your bounty!
The iguanas ran right to the store with your lonely little tomato for some onion, cilantro and basil – I hear they love salsa!
Kelly
After her move, my sister quickly figured out what works in upstate NY does not work in the tropics.
*sigh* All of that work.
I’ll stick with Zone 7!
A valiant effort! I’m so sorry it didn’t work out for you. I imagine the lizards and iguanas will be quite disappointed that you are throwing in the towel!
Oh Karah! You have iguanas and I have deer but we both have the same issue!!! I hate vegetable gardening, all that work and the wildlife get all the enjoyment.
Thanks for the laugh, I am praying for your cherry tomato.
xox
Oh man, I thought Iggy and his friends were sort of cute and added a certain island “je ne sais quoi” to the whole adventure until I read about this! I mean, those lizards have a whole bounty of vegetation to munch on, its an island for gosh sakes, why do they need to pick on your seedlings!?
Aww so sorry about the garden!
We have the worst time growing veggies, because of critters, too. Of course our critters are deer, bunnies, and that darn groundhog that lives under our deck(he’s a voracious eater.) I’ll trade one gluttonous groundhog for a few of your iguanas.
We had the same plans this summer. I’m not working for the first time ever too, so I thought I’d take a stab at planting vegetable and flower gardens. Will be my first time, so I’m prepared for an Iguana-like experience. He could have at least saved you the tomato!
Oh gosh. I’m trying a garden for the first time ever this year. Well, I think I am..
Haha…I have a black thumb so I have never considered gardening. Your tomato definitely is more than you will ever see come out of my yard
Ha! It sounds to me like you’re actually a pretty good gardener—it’s the just garden’s location (and those little critters!) that is the problem!
What a pain in those lizards are…there is always a new pest to adjust to when you move. I had a huge deer problem when I lived in St Louis..they ate everything until I discovered an easy to make homemade spray
http://www.creativeinchicago.com/2011/05/homemade-deer-repellant-spray.html
maybe there is something your could make to deter the lizards
I just KNEW that was going to happen to your little tomato. So many times, I’ve watched a strawberry or cherry tomato, trying to wait until just the right time to eat it, and I decide “just one more day”… Then go out to something filled with bird or slug nibbles (yuck), or NOTHING.
Another AWESOME reason why I hate lizards!!!!! Blech!!! So sorry, friend. Good effort, though.
Since I couldn’t tell the perspective, I thought your cherry tomato was huge!
I’ll tell ya what. Since my tomato plant grew a total of ZERO tomatoes, I think yoursis a real beauty!
~ Dana
What a fabulous … okay, not fabulous as in the end result … but fabulously told story! i hung on each and every word!
Linda
I’m so sorry in advance for giggling at your frustration! Those buggers must be so frustrating! Grrr!
It was very entertaining, and I love that you did actually get a picture of that one gorgeous cherry tomato before the thief made off with it!
Hopefully there’s a farmer’s market on the island! Maybe someone has figured out how to keep the lizards out. I’m thinking GIANT terrarium? Biodome sans lizards? Indoor greenhouse? Hehe.
Hope you have a nice week! Head back over to the Hyatt and have a great cocktail, that looked fun!
xo-Lisa
Oh no, Karah! lol I’d say you are a gardener and farmer’s market…that’s the rumor amongst the iguanas. But I’m with you. I don’t have a green thumb so I stick with DIY.
Oh Karah, I’m so happy I popped in and read your blog…I relocated to the Bahamas and we have tons of lizards. I tried gardening 2 years ago, but I didn’t know it was the lizards eating everything, I thought it was the neighbors cat or something! That was my 1st & last time gardening. Too much work and nothing to show for it. Last year, I saw an iguana in my yard for the 1st time, almost had a panic attack and nearly died; now, there is absolutely no love in my yard….weeds are welcome!
Great effort! We haven’t planted our garden yet, but I’m really itching to do so!
U r not only talented but hilarious! Love your blog!
Oh, I needed a chuckle this morning, Karah ~ thank you!! I’d love to know how other gardeners on the island succeed! Back to the drawing board my friend — maybe pumpkins for fall?
xo Heidi
I love this post
You go girl. Take that cherry tomato and make the best salad you ever had! Thanks for making me smile today 
blessings,
karianne
I definitely got a good laugh out of this post!
Oh no! That’s so sad. I’ve never been a gardner. My mom is an amazing gardener and knows just about everything there is to know about every plant on the planet… I didn’t get that gene.